National Day of Reflection – remembering the last year.

On 23 March 2020 we were ordered to stay at home and told that many lives would be cut short and that the toughest time was ahead of us.

We braced ourselves for what we thought was to come but nothing prepared us for what we were to endure. All of us at home, children too, away from their friends, unable to see precious grandparents and many watching lives fall apart as the pandemic raged on.

Today is about reflecting on the year we have survived. Remembering what we have lost, what we have endured and what we have learned. As a therapist, I have continued to work with clients, many dealing with trauma and others dealing with everyday life that has become so much harder to manage, alone. 

Over the past few months, I have heard about the many hardships out there, the things most of us don’t think about. People who are struggling with a new baby or maternity leave, alone; people who need people and have had to adapt every ounce of their being to manage, alone; a schoolboy who committed suicide because life just got too much for him. Then there are those who are finding that this new normal is bringing up self-doubt, anxiety and panic because life just isn’t right. All these people are just like you and I – normal people trying to make sense of this alien and lonely world.

My message has always been the same, be kind to yourself and others. We don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. We don’t know how hard life has been for some; many don’t want to know, but the reality is that there are so many people who have had the worse year of their life who deserve our compassion, empathy and care.

Many of us know of one or more couples who have broken up over the last year because of the extreme living conditions we are experiencing; support centres for victims of domestic abuse, rehabilitation centres and services for the most vulnerable have had to scale back or close. How have those people managed in this desperate time? Thankfully, we have all found creative ways to support because people in those roles want to help, they want to make someone’s life that bit easier.

Despite all this, many of us have survived, we are still here, a bit battered and bruised, but we have survived.  The human spirit is stronger than we realise, we adapt, and we move forward as best as we can.

We have found ways to stay in touch, to maintain the relationships that we know now are tantamount to our survival. We have used the resources at our disposal to find ways to help and care and support each other. Most of us have pulled together for the greater good.

Most therapists have continued to work throughout the lockdowns, whether that be remotely, on the phone or face to face for those who need that extra support. There is help is out there – there are people who want to help, professional and otherwise, so reach out. Together we can support those most wounded or struggling as we strive for normality again.